I met Shani tonight. She was sick or at least pretending to be sick. I asked her to talk to her, and she accepted.
Me: I would like to talk to you.
She: OK. Let's walk and talk, but please no driving. I feel nauseous.
She definitely didn't want to talk to me tonight. She even asked me not to go out with my car to make sure that it doesn't take longer than she expects. I don't know who began to talk about Nancy first, but we had a talk about Nancy.
She: I am upset that she didn't invit me for her engagement celebration.
Me: It was not an engagement celebration. It was her boyfriend's birthday.
She: It was.
Me: In that case, she should have invited me.
She: Why? She used to have her lunch everyday with me.
Me: She bought her clothes with me. She practiced her driving with me. She got her driver's license with me. Her apartment lease is still in my name! Why? I think that they didn't have more money to invite more people. They have a student life. You shouldn't be upset.
She: OK.
I asked her not to be upset, but I was unhappy myself because I really didn't expect Nancy not to invite me. It meant that she was no longer wanted to be a friend :(
Then we talked about her sickness. I took about 20 minutes, and I didn't say anything. I tried to see if it was a good time to talk to her, and it was not. I asked her to sit somewhere because I was not comfortable to talk, but she didn't accept.
Me: I am going to tell you something, but you should promise me something. Do you promise me that not to stop being friends with me after I said it?
She: I should know what that is first.
Me: I can't tell you unless you promise me. I would like to be friends.
She: OK, but how can I know if you don't tell me?
Me: I can ignore it, and don't tell you anything, and be friends. Why should I take this risk and ask you something and lose our friendship?
She: I don't know.
Me: If you can't promise me, I won't tell you.
[moments of silence walking around]
She: OK. I am very tired, and I want to go home.
Me: But we are not even close. I accompany you to your home.
She: No. I would like to go from here. You can go home, too.
Me: OK.
And she left me. She got a few steps further that I said, "Tell me if you changed your mind."
She: About what?
Me: About hearing what I was going to tell you.
She turned her face and didn't say anything. I looked at her going further. Suddenly she ran. I got surprised because she was sick, and she couldn't even walk well. I looked at her, and she put her hand on a boy's shoulder to get his attention. Then they started to walk together in a different path from her place. I looked at them going further and further walking side by side, and my heart broke slowly.
I sat there because I couldn't take any step. I had no idea. She couldn't walk with me, but she could run for him! She probably doesn't like me as much as I do like her. I am just another boy for her to have some possibly casual fun and use me like other and leave me as soon as she doesn't want me. This came to my mind, and I wrote for her
Me: "I didn't know that I was such an intruder for you."
"You are not. Why do you say this? I am not good now. I am bored. I am sorry if I made you upset," she replied after fifteen minutes.
Me: "Sorry, but one-sided friendship is meaningless."
She: "True. But it is not one-sided."
Me: "I felt it is."
and she never answered.
Kids, this was the story of Shani, a girl whom I liked and she liked me, but we couldn't be together because of her selfishness. She knew that what I was going to ask her, but she didn't make me sure that she would stay a friend. You may ask, why didn't I ask her to be my girlfriend? My answer is she really didn't care to have me as a friend or anyone else. It matters to me. I will never break my friendship because of my friend's words, but she wanted to consider this. The fact that she told me that she may stop being friend with me if I say something that she doesn't like shows that she doesn't like me as much as I like her. I wanted to have her as a friend, but I think that it is impossible now. I can't be a friend of someone who is waiting to break our friendship because of some words.
Me: I would like to talk to you.
She: OK. Let's walk and talk, but please no driving. I feel nauseous.
She definitely didn't want to talk to me tonight. She even asked me not to go out with my car to make sure that it doesn't take longer than she expects. I don't know who began to talk about Nancy first, but we had a talk about Nancy.
She: I am upset that she didn't invit me for her engagement celebration.
Me: It was not an engagement celebration. It was her boyfriend's birthday.
She: It was.
Me: In that case, she should have invited me.
She: Why? She used to have her lunch everyday with me.
Me: She bought her clothes with me. She practiced her driving with me. She got her driver's license with me. Her apartment lease is still in my name! Why? I think that they didn't have more money to invite more people. They have a student life. You shouldn't be upset.
She: OK.
I asked her not to be upset, but I was unhappy myself because I really didn't expect Nancy not to invite me. It meant that she was no longer wanted to be a friend :(
Then we talked about her sickness. I took about 20 minutes, and I didn't say anything. I tried to see if it was a good time to talk to her, and it was not. I asked her to sit somewhere because I was not comfortable to talk, but she didn't accept.
Me: I am going to tell you something, but you should promise me something. Do you promise me that not to stop being friends with me after I said it?
She: I should know what that is first.
Me: I can't tell you unless you promise me. I would like to be friends.
She: OK, but how can I know if you don't tell me?
Me: I can ignore it, and don't tell you anything, and be friends. Why should I take this risk and ask you something and lose our friendship?
She: I don't know.
Me: If you can't promise me, I won't tell you.
[moments of silence walking around]
She: OK. I am very tired, and I want to go home.
Me: But we are not even close. I accompany you to your home.
She: No. I would like to go from here. You can go home, too.
Me: OK.
And she left me. She got a few steps further that I said, "Tell me if you changed your mind."
She: About what?
Me: About hearing what I was going to tell you.
She turned her face and didn't say anything. I looked at her going further. Suddenly she ran. I got surprised because she was sick, and she couldn't even walk well. I looked at her, and she put her hand on a boy's shoulder to get his attention. Then they started to walk together in a different path from her place. I looked at them going further and further walking side by side, and my heart broke slowly.
I sat there because I couldn't take any step. I had no idea. She couldn't walk with me, but she could run for him! She probably doesn't like me as much as I do like her. I am just another boy for her to have some possibly casual fun and use me like other and leave me as soon as she doesn't want me. This came to my mind, and I wrote for her
Me: "I didn't know that I was such an intruder for you."
"You are not. Why do you say this? I am not good now. I am bored. I am sorry if I made you upset," she replied after fifteen minutes.
Me: "Sorry, but one-sided friendship is meaningless."
She: "True. But it is not one-sided."
Me: "I felt it is."
and she never answered.
Kids, this was the story of Shani, a girl whom I liked and she liked me, but we couldn't be together because of her selfishness. She knew that what I was going to ask her, but she didn't make me sure that she would stay a friend. You may ask, why didn't I ask her to be my girlfriend? My answer is she really didn't care to have me as a friend or anyone else. It matters to me. I will never break my friendship because of my friend's words, but she wanted to consider this. The fact that she told me that she may stop being friend with me if I say something that she doesn't like shows that she doesn't like me as much as I like her. I wanted to have her as a friend, but I think that it is impossible now. I can't be a friend of someone who is waiting to break our friendship because of some words.
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